Over recent weeks, we’ve been exploring the idea of contemplative prayer, with the idea being that we’re seeking to become aware of God’s presence. That’s not an easy thing. Our minds wander. Thoughts and feelings crowd in. We’re constantly challenged with distraction.
How can we do better?
One approach is to take the time at the end of each day to look back and to ask: where was God present in my day? The idea is to revisit the events of the day in order to see past the distractions and so learn to become aware of that presence that escaped us.
The value of looking at things in retrospect is shown in the experience of the two disciples on the Emmaus Road (Luke 24:13-35).
The timing is important. It’s on the Sunday of Jesus’ resurrection and they are aware that the tomb of Jesus was found empty by a group of women who visited it early in the morning. They are discussing Jesus’ execution and the mystery of the empty tomb when they are joined by a “stranger” who, it turns out, is the risen Jesus. They have an extensive discussion with him and even invite him to stay with them at the end of the day’s journey.
All of this happens without them recognising Jesus. It is only as Jesus blesses the meal and shares it that the two disciples suddenly realise who it is who has been beside them all this time.
Later, as they reflected on their experience they asked: Did not our heart burn within us?
Clearly something had been happening in the moment. They just didn’t realise it until later.
The lesson is simple: we don’t always recognise Jesus in the moment. And that means taking time to reflect back can be a good way to see what we at first missed.
Remember here that one of the basic theological commitments is that Jesus is always with us. That was his promise to his followers when he gave them the Great Commission: “I am with you, even until the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:20). It’s this promise which informs the practice of what’s know as the Examen.
Now, technically, the Examen is a bit more sophisticated than I am describing it here, but it’s basically an end of day exercise in which we ask God to show us how he was present with us during the day. Not if he was present—that much is already assured—but how he was present.
And here there are two important points to note.
First, this isn’t an exercise in self-examination. The question isn’t “what sort of Christian was I today?” but rather “How was God with me today?” That’s an important distinction because what we’re trying to do is to discern the ways that God moves in our lives. That will, of course, have implications for how we live, but the immediate task is to sharpen our awareness of God’s presence.
Second, it’s about seeing beyond the good and bad of our experiences. The disciples on the Road to Emmaus were having a terrible time and it showed. Jesus himself commented on it (Luke 24:17). But still Jesus was with them. And this points to something important: we should never take our experience as proof of anything when it comes to God’s love for us. Our day might have been dominated by painful experiences, but we want to see that God who walks with us in that pain. Here trusting in Christ’s assurance that he is “always with us” is all important.
So take the time at the end of each day to stop and reflect. Reflect on the specific moments and events with the prayer: “Lord, show me how you were with me.” In retrospect, you may recall moments when “your heart burned within you.” If we can cultivate awareness of what God was doing during our day, we will sharpen our awareness of what God is doing in the moment. That “awareness in the moment” is the ultimate goal.